Behind The Blog Name: Awaiting Disaster.

I have received a few questions asking me why is my blog name AWAITING DISASTER and this post is dedicated solely for that question. Lol. It's kinda long for an answer to a single question but I have the feeling to elaborate so here it goes:

Whenever I join a social media website and I'll register for an account and there's this space wherein I was supposed to "say something about myself" there's this nagging feeling inside me to tell people that I am a rebel. You know, someone who is really not accustomed in what is the usual. Although I am not into the type to be arrested (yet) but I have been one since a friend told me this:

"If you go home now, you are still late. If you go home now or later, there will be no difference, you'd still be scolded either way. So just enjoy the moment. Soon, your parents will get used to you going home late, but of course, you still have to prove to them that you aren't doing anything illegal and that you are responsible for your self."

And no matter how she sounded like a BAD INFLUENCE, it did changed my view on things. I became a rebel with a cause. I know, I was never the perfect daughter. And still am. But I am 24 years old now and I have not used drugs, engaged in any pre marital activities, have not been caught or been in jail or put any house on fire. My teenage years has been all about my friends, my social life and self discovery. It's all about having fun, because the "you should be responsible now" years will come soon and who knows if you'd still have fun like this time? It has been my priority aside from studying. I wanted to do things I wanted to do at a young age. 

I usually drink with friends whenever we hang out. I smoke occasionally and I sometimes say inappropriate words for a woman like me would say but I am comfortable with who I am. And my friends are okay with it too. It went on for years. I started a production house that organizes gigs and events. And I was just 17 at that time. I did stupid things with my friends. It wasn't easy at first and of course, there are down times but we got the hang of it. My social life is on it's peak around late 2007 to early 2009. I party almost three times a week, I go to class with just an hour or no sleep at all. I juggled my social life with my studying and it wasn't that hard before. I believe my body condition at that time is the big factor. I was young and used to sleepless night and overnight parties. 

And in that years, my parents really did get used to it. I mean, at first, they were all "it's not safe" or "you might get into trouble" or something but when I introduced them to my life, they became a little more accepting than other parents would be. I mean, my friends find my parents cool. My mom and dad wanted to meet my friends so we usually hang out in our house. They can also sleep overnight after the gigs and such. I proved to them that my time can really be productive and I am responsible.

But among other things, I believe I am a disaster. My old self screamed that fact whenever I realize the stupid things I did. Getting drunk, hurting other people just because I want to, being proud and being a black sheep. I have been, and will always be.

I am not accustomed to "what it should be" and I always refuse to think or do what is told. Well, I am not rebelling for the fact that I just had to be different but it's because I really do think differently. I started this blog early 2014 when I was already a published writer and I have a different life now. I can't say it's better because I never believe my teenage years was worse or bad. I guess, it balances out. I have been into different line of interests and I met a lot of people. Some of them stayed, some of them left, most of them are remembered. 

I am still lost, as to where I am heading. And the disaster in me isn't leaving.. but awaiting.

So, how about you? What's the story behind your blog name? :)

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